Getting over Trauma

I feel like the world is very disensitized to tramatic situations. Its like we don't mourn anymore. My cousin died in January but now it feels like everyobe is over it. Not like she never existed, but we have to move on and we can't dwell. And since I left U of I I have ignored the fact that I'm mourning inside. And the fact that I'm ignoring the pain inside is causing me to become cold and non feeling on the outside. Not like I'm hurting other people but I'm building a guard so I won't have to hut anymore. It's wierd because I feel like I need to get over it but its obvious to everyone else that I'm unhappy. I know that I need to be joyful in my sufferings because that sthe only way I'm going to get through it, but sometimes I feel like I'm trying to be happy byt I just can't. I feel like I need to make new friends but its like I'm not myself anymore and I lost my power of making new friends, not to mention I'm not sure if I want them. I guess the first step is being open so I'll try that.